What do you do when you realise that you might be going the wrong way, have done the wrong thing, or not done what you said you were going to?
When you feel like you've let yourself, or other people down?
What do you do when you feel like you have failed?
What do you do when something feels so overwhelming, unachievable, hard... that you just don't think you have what it takes within you to start it, let alone overcome it?
How do you deal with that or move through it?
Do you berate yourself? Punish yourself?
Get mad with other people or circumstances?
Do you just give up?
Or, do you see it for what it is?
"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts"
- Winston Churchill.
I did this video on not giving up, even when it feels like the task ahead of you is bigger than you can deal with, that it's beyond what you feel like you are capable of, that it's more than you know how to do right now from standing where you are.
Then on the weekend, we watched a movie called The Darkest Hour, which is set in Great Britain in 1940 and is about Winston Churchill and the role he played in the Second World War. Churchill was a brilliant orator and many quotes from speeches he made during his time as Prime Minister are part of our everyday conversation today.
Even though the task ahead of him was huge; the British soldiers were poorly armed, poorly supported, surrounded by enemies on all sides, and it looked to most people that there was simply no way out of this situation - Churchill decided to speak a different reality.
Churchill spoke with confidence and absolute belief that the situation could be turned around - that in fact it was already being turned around right now. And in doing this, he won the hearts and minds of those around him, and those around him started to believe that these words that he was speaking, were indeed the truth. These words became actions. And of course, as history goes on to show, that vision he shared, those words he spoke, did become the truth.
"Never give in. Never give in. Never, never, never, never--in nothing, great or small, large or petty--never give in, except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force. Never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy".
- Winston Churchill
When we feel like we have been knocked down, it is easy to want to give up and stay there. Getting knocked down is not the problem; experiencing what we may see as a failure, or a disaster, is not the problem. The problem is that we get stuck there, we get stuck in the obstacles and challenges, and we lose sight of what we are hoping to achieve.
“You don’t have a problem with the problem.
You have a problem with your attachment to the problem.”
- Grandmaster Issam Kadamani
We need to stay focused on what we want to achieve. When we are experiencing adversity, we have an opportunity to learn something about ourselves; it is a gift to strengthen our faith, a chance to become stronger, to help us build our resilience.
"To conquer frustration, one must remain intensely focused on the outcome, not the obstacles".
– T.F. Hodge
To not see being knocked down as a reason to give up, but to maybe see it for what it is - part of the process we need to go through to help us achieve our outcome. To remind us to hold the vision, and to trust the process with everything we have.
To not let the feeling of defeat, defeat us. To see it as a reminder that we have to keep going.
We need to let that feeling of defeat light the fire in our belly so that we can come back stronger, more connected, better prepared, more enthusiastic and ready to fight the good fight for another day.
"Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to learn".
– Pema Chödrön
And remember, happiness is to be found in the overcoming of obstacles and challenges in our lives, not in the absence of them.
With love always,
Just because we might feel like we’ve been knocked down, it’s up to us as to whether we stay down
Fiona Redding is the founder of The Happiness Hunter, co-host of #BusinessAddicts The Podcast and author of The Happiness Hunter’s Guide to Meditation.
Based on leading research, metaphysical principles and her own real life learnings and experiences, The Happiness Hunter will teach and empower you to change your life with the strategies, tools and mindset shifts required to live an abundant, successful and healthy life, full of passion, joy and meaning, and free of stress and anxiety.
Our services include life coaching and healing services, a 3 month online Bootcamp, workshops, retreats, keynote presentations and corporate wellbeing programs with a focus on life integration instead of work life balance.
The Happiness Hunter also organises free community walks and weekly classes throughout Australia in an effort to increase happiness & wellbeing through human connection, nature and exercise, which is supported by a leadership network.